Monday, February 28, 2005

Wonder how to set a table...properly? The guild of pro butlers lets us, of the plebian class, know all the how-to and the lingo of table-setting. Silverware, anyone?

Oh, yes, I 've had to brush up- the wedding is coming up. I bought the most beautiful Stash tea, a Jasmine white for part of a shower favor, but now I want to try it out myself. Why oh why do I not learn to always buy two of those sorts of things? I always want one and then I have to do without for so long.... it takes me forever to get back to the specialty shopping that I will do for others and not for myself. I would save so much time if I would just acknowledge that I not only want something but that it is ok for me to have something.

A long time ago I did some psyche digging. It was along the voices that we hear inside- I always heard my father's voice, and that is a strong self-denying voice. But not in a good way. Self-denial for others is good, for its own sake is bad.

I know there are all those arguments of what is good/bad/ blah. I don't have time for that right now- take my word for it that I have it right on this one. The second sort of self-denial just squeezes all the fun out of life and wastes it. Like "oh no- you are just pouring that out and nobody gets any of it...whyyyyy?"

that's all the pop-psychology out of me today. ciao.